Body Peace vs. Body Positivity: What’s the Difference?
You've found yourself doomscrolling on social media lately and noticed so much content is related to body image. The summer season is prime time for the focus to be on bodies—with the weather warming up, outfits shift, pool and beach days increase in frequency, and hashtags such as #hotgirlsummer and #beachbody live rent-free in so many people's minds.
Summertime has always been particularly hard for most people when it comes to body image, but these days seem more difficult, having to wade through the seemingly never-ending influx of GLP-1 use. The daily bombardment of messages telling people that their bodies need to change seems to have hit a new level, and it is difficult to ignore.
This blog will focus on the differences between body positivity, body neutrality, and body peace. After exploring how body positivity originated—and where it went wrong—focus will shift towards finding tangible ways to stop being at war with your body and find body peace.
Where Body Positivity Actually Started
The body positivity movement did not originate as a self-esteem campaign on Instagram. In fact, it started decades before Instagram was created with NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance). NAAFA is an organization that started in the 1960s as a civil rights organization in which BIPOC, queer, and disabled communities joined to demand equal rights and fight against fat discrimination. Its message was clear—fat bodies are deserving of care and dignity. Here, the body positivity movement was born.
How Body Positivity Lost Its Way
As social media has become more widely used over the past few decades, body positivity has been co-opted to take on a whole new meaning…or rather, it's been watered down with a lukewarm message. Rather than advocating for equal rights for all body shapes and sizes, the space has been dominated by thin, mostly white influencers preaching body love while ignoring thin privilege. This has felt somewhat empty and inaccessible to most people. The majority of people who sit in my office have echoed this sentiment. Body positivity sounds too much like "unicorns and rainbows", particularly when we have been taught to hate our bodies.
Body Neutrality vs. Body Peace: Moving Beyond Tolerance
Body neutrality has shown up as a concept for those who have felt as if body positivity was out of reach. Body neutrality focuses more on how the body shows up and what it does, rather than focusing on acceptance of appearance. For those in recovery from an eating disorder (or really just anyone who has found themselves struggling with body image, aka: all of us), this is a much more tangible perspective, as it acknowledges that people will have hard body image days. It takes away the expectation that one needs to feel positively about one's body in order to move throughout the world. Body love in today's society seems implausible; body neutrality is a helpful middle ground.
While body neutrality has helped many people in their body image journeys, I believe there is a difference in tolerating your body and being at peace with your body. It's about ending a war that may have been going on for decades—at your own expense. Body peace pushes past neutrality and focuses on building a relationship with one's body that can hold both the good body image days and the bad. It's about nurturance and appreciation, no matter what your body looks like.
7 Tangible Ways to Move Toward Body Peace
While it is important to remember that building body peace can take time (give yourself some grace), here are seven tangible ways to move towards body peace:
Consider the origins of your body image. Where do your beliefs about your body come from? Are they stemming from an industry wanting your money? Do you hold different beliefs about your loved ones' bodies? If you answered yes to either question, it may be beneficial to challenge the validity of those beliefs.
Shift focus. Shift from focusing on the appearance of your body to the experiences of your body. While this is easier said than done, it can build a sense of appreciation for what your body does day-in and day-out. For example, when you find yourself critiquing the shape of your arms, consider how your arms allow you to hug loved ones or feel the warmth of the sun on your skin.
Reframe movement. Exercise can often be used as punishment or atonement; no wonder so many people do not enjoy it! When we reframe movement as joyful rather than focusing on shrinking bodies, we build more compassion. As a radical act of self-care, consider movement that feels fun as you reframe your exercise views.
Build trust with body cues. Eating disorders and disordered eating can create disconnection from body cues, such as hunger and fullness. They can also create disconnection from the cues bodies give related to emotional experiences. Body peace means relearning how to listen to what our bodies are telling us, and doing so with curiosity over judgment.
Practice mindfulness. Speaking of curiosity over judgment…You may notice critical thoughts arise about your body throughout the day. Practice noticing the thought without judging the thought. Imagine it as a cloud floating by in the sky—you don't have to grab onto the thought. Let it pass.
Shift from the "arrival" mindset. People do not wake up with body peace. As cheesy as this will sound, body peace is a journey, not a destination. When we give up the destination mindset, we give ourselves permission to go at our own pace. We give ourselves grace for days that are not linear or "perfect." The goal of body peace is not to never struggle with body image again. It's not tolerating or white-knuckling your day. It's about healing your relationship with your body and striving to end the war on your body.
A Note for Parents and Caregivers: How to Model Body Peace at Home
If you are a parent or caregiver, this section is for you. How can you help your child build body peace? Language matters. Take inventory of the way you speak about bodies—whether it's about your body or someone else's. Avoid talking about bodies (or food) in polarized manners ("good/bad", "healthy/not healthy", "right/wrong") and talk about how our bodies work for us. For example, try highlighting strengths over frustrations. "I'm so proud of my body for helping me lift that furniture" vs "I can't have dessert tonight. I've been eating too much junk." Model body peace through language (and actions). Our kids are listening.
Ready to Build Body Peace? You Don't Have to Do It Alone
This week, give yourself permission to move towards body peace. Consider what obstacles lie in the way and how to address them. Be kind to yourself as you remind yourself that body peace takes time, but it is worth the work you put in. To learn more about group therapy to build body peace, click here.